
"To love is to be vulnerable"~~CS Lewis 養成伴侶與家庭治療師的最基本且最佳的訓練方式為經驗性方法,就是:接受個人治療並處理自己原生家庭的議題。
Sunday, December 31, 2006
Pictures of 2006--Living Strong in Taipei
I spent a lot of time last year, on re-learning what Taipei is. It is at times very difficult for me, becuse
after three years' staying in the country side of San Francisco City, where there is not much traffic and pepole around, now I have to re-adjust to this noisy and smelling (in night markets, oh yes) city. It took me a long time...to feel ok to sit in a food stand on the roadside and eat like everybody else. Not that I like to play princess or anything, I think my body is more sensitive than average people. But people here do not usually understand, for example, I really do not like the smoke of BBQ, and the dirty, greesy floor in some reataurants. The noise of dog barking, drill or car moving freak me out all the time. But seems to me, most of the people can tolerate that here...I think I might have some kind of social phobia or closest phobia or something being in this city--people here are not always polite, like the people I would see in Canada or Silicon Valley. Sometimes they talk really loud on my face, and I don't know how to take it (should I yell back, or be polite as I always am)? I don't know. All I know is that I am starting to read stuff by Dali Lama and some other stuff to calm my spirit and to find ways to continue to live in this city peacefully...

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美學者研究:拖拉成性多因太過追求完美
【中央社記者禾楓云溫哥華十二日專電】
許多人做事總是拖拖拉拉,能挨到明天的事絕不今天做。根據一項心理學研究,一般人平均每五人就有一人擁有這種個性,而形成的主因,未必是懶惰,反而可能是太過執著追求完美。
芝加哥大學教授史堤爾刊登於美國心理學會期刊上的一篇研究報告指出,做事拖拉的人(procrastinator )經常自信心低於平常人,對於自己能完成工作的期許也相對較低。在這種情況下,他們更容易把事情延後,卻也因此表現更差,變成一種惡性循環。
史堤爾也發現,這類人如果討厭現有的工作,他們也更可能會把事情延後。
不過,他也指出,這項研究結果不代表完美主義者都會拖拉成性;事實上,事事追求完美的人反而比較不會拖拉,當他們真有拖拉行為時,往往自責更深。
史堤爾表示,決定一個人是否擁有拖拉特質的最大因素,在於此人是否個性衝動。他說,那些任意隨性、個性衝動的個人,做事延宕的機率往往也高於一般人。
至於這種人格特質是否來自基因遺傳,史堤爾表示,目前並不清楚,只是這種個性似乎也有日漸蔓延開來的跡象,學界應再針對這一問題做進一步研究。 960112
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